Crushed Tomato

A friend of Avani is very fair in her complexion and suggested to her in her childlike innocence that if she wanted to become fair like her, she should put crushed tomato on her face. Avani told this to us and we could instantly make out what was going on in her mind. It was not about the crushed tomato but the need she was feeling to look like somebody else. If this is not dealt with correctly, this can handicap a child mentally for life. 

I told her that looking and becoming fair is great but it works only for a few minutes to impress other people. We as human beings are composed of 3 parts - body, mind and soul. The Soul is constant- it never dies and is never born - it continues to live on carrying all it’s memories and impressions, the body is fixed too in the sense that we are given it without too much choice - the only thing we can work is on our mind and thoughts. Whenever we interact with anybody, after the first few minutes when the focus is only on how we look, the only thing that decides the beauty of a person is the mind - what we think and what we speak. We can work on that and it’s in our control. And that’s the glasses that people see us through for all the time after the first few minutes. I think she got it.

I’ve been dark in complexion and coming from a family whose roots are based in UP, fairness is a BIG deal. I was literally the dark horse of the family. It would have been very easy for me to have an inferiority complex about myself and carry it all my life. But thank God, my parents were so wise, they programmed me in a way that I never even saw it that way. They always brought my attention to what matters in life - beyond only the skin....I’m forever grateful to them for saving me from the silliest problem in life...